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Glow

by Tripsun

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1.
Pollution 03:49
Find a better way, To clear your mind, Reset your brain. I need some time to illustrate my thoughts before I start my day, but I always check my phone, As soon as I’m awake, and it sets the tone for the rest of the day It’s mental pollution, And constant distractions. Reality loosens, Leads to subconscious destruction. I need to practice moderation, to overcome compulsion Roll another one, Never mind my spoiled lungs, Don’t wanna stay up all night, With my thoughts. Swear if I don’t roll another one
I’ll stay up all night, So I rolled another one, And shut my brain off. It’s mental pollution, And constant distractions. Reality loosens, Leads to subconscious destruction. I need to practice moderation, to overcome compulsion 
need to practice moderation To overcome my compulsion ———————————————— Reality loosens, it’s mental pollution We’re all deluded
2.
Swisher 03:17
Sit around, Think about, Life if I made the right decisions and, Ruminate, and analyse, Any negative moment stuck in my mind, Even if it’s the most minor thing, I will dwell, I will sink, And find myself, Losing hope, And feeling trapped, Feeling trapped in a cycle of negatives 
 constant reminders to better things even if it takes the longest I will never quit, Depressive mindset I’m done with it. if I’m honest, I can admit that I’ve gotten better, But sometimes I slip back in to a mindset I have no control over, And it’s so damn haunting, 25 and burning out, At 30 will I even be around? *
 Sunrise, my thoughts like blisters on my brain, Another day of facing the inane, Making friends with my mind, is such a useless endeavour Please tell me it won’t stay this way forever if I’m honest, I can admit that I’ve gotten better, But sometimes I slip back in to a mindset I have no control over, And it’s so damn haunting, 24 and burning out, At 30 will I even be around?
3.
Dazed 02:56
You can always tell when I’m stressed, by how much skin is left on the flesh around my finger nails, Cause my cuticles are non existent, my lack of thought is consistent, and there's so much room for improvement, so why do I set restrictions? I don’t know, swear I don't know. i’m just moving slow, Incase I lose control. We can all use something to brighten up our day, one brief moment can make the biggest change. Never learnt how to set pace, I only know how to save face, Confused and deranged from an early age, So a double life I engaged To minimise my rage, And the fucking shame, the constant strain, I can never be present when my mind is 20 years ahead, but thats the fucking point, its all in my head, This constant dread, is nonexistent. We can all use something to brighten up our day, one brief moment can make the biggest change.
4.
I talk to myself inside my head Hey how are you doing today? I'm OK just got a lot on my plate Clear it up I'm not coming back again I'm sick of always reminding you Of all the shit that you gotta do Cos you gotta do what you gotta do And I ain't gonna do that for you. Then I start getting confused like bippidy boppidy boo and my brain starts to diffuse, exits the room and says "It's all on you" Now what am I to do? But sit here in my room Procrastinating youth So afraid of the truth You're fucking lazy and you know it’s true I'm stabbing the brain inside my head Won't stop till it's fucking dead Knife slices into thin air Nothing there but I like to pretend That I'm normal just like you And everything's cool When every single night I stay up with the moon And evaluate every mistake And every haunting step That slowly turned me into this fucking wreck Have you ever crossed the street? And thought, "Just fucking hit me," I've become a product of my misery This world just wasn't made for me I'm trying to cope I'm grasping for hope
5.
Glow 02:44
I learned to lie from early Then realised crying is healthy So I'll ball my eyes out as I fucking please. Cause it’s better than bottling up the negative energy And risk blowing up in a fit of rage in front of friends and family Daffodil, Shining in your summer glow Taking in what you know Will only help you breathe and grow. I wanna be as pure as you and nothing like me I wanna stand still, Intact with my roots. I woke up to my headspace Closing in so quickly It’s given up on me My lack of thought’s unruly But it’s hard to think clearly When all you do is worry.􏰀 and at times I hide from reality But time always catches up with me It always catches up with me. Daffodil Shining in the summer glow Taking in what you know Will only help you breathe and grow I wanna be as pure as you and nothing like me I wanna stand still Intact with my roots I wanna be as pure as you, and nothing like me
6.
Safe 03:48
Put it in perspective But I’m not too perceptive My mind is deceptive Alters the way I see and hear things So why do I give in, To self deprecation, As a coping mechanism, Knowing it only worsens? How do I focus on my breathing When I’m running out of breath? How do I fixate on the good things When I can’t even give myself a rest? Feeling out of place and, Growing so complacent With my lack of practice To find some solace I’m out of patience. I’ve settled in With feeling sick and questioning Every single thing. How do I focus on my breathing When I’m running out of breath? How do I fixate on the good things When I can’t even give myself a rest?

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released June 7, 2019

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Tripsun London, UK

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